I should be used to the frequent monkey wrench being thrown into our lives, and the past couple of weeks have been no exception! I called my urologist back on Friday, January 22nd to tell him I think I was passing a kidney stone. (This was #21 for me, so I keep him on speed dial). If you have been getting church prayer requests, or FB updates, you may want to skip to the end and see where we are now.
He ordered some meds and testing to confirm my diagnosis (I was correct), and I settled in at home praying that I could pass this stone without much additional intervention needed (I did).....and then came the monkey wrench. On Thursday, January 28th the doctor called and said that my right kidney (not the one that was hurting) showed a decent sized stone (making this one #22). He said that he would prefer to proactively schedule lithotripsy (a shockwave ultrasound procedure that breaks up the stone into smaller sand-like particles). I REALLY didn't want to, because I have done it a couple times before, and had some discomfort. My pain was better, as I passed stone #21, and wasn't looking forward to undergoing more treatment, especially during the pandemic. After a lengthy debate with my doctor, who stressed that if we did nothing and waited, he placed odds at 50/50 that I could pass a stone this large without intervention. We didn't really want it to become an emergency, so I relented and scheduled the lithotripsy for Tuesday, February 2nd.
The procedure went well, and I was rejoicing when the doctor said a stent was not necessary. They are very irritating and unpleasant, so I felt like I dodged a bullet. The next couple of days I was resting at home, and coping with the pain but it gradually worsened. By Wednesday overnight, I told Chad something wasn't going well, as pain was getting out of control, and urine production had slowed. By Thursday morning, pain level was at 10/10, even with oral pain meds I had left, so off to the emergency room we went. After a 3 hour wait in the waiting room, writhing in pain, moaning and crying. Trust me, I have a high tolerance for pain and low tolerance for drawing attention to myself. For me to be in a crowded waiting room making a "scene" is a good indication of my level of misery. We had a new CT scan and quickly realized a larger chunk of my now broken up #22 stone, combined with my "smaller than normal anatomy", had wedged itself in the ureter just outside the kidney, and was blocking the flow of urine.
We love analogies and visual aids in our house, mostly Chad likes them when I try to communicate nerdy science/medical info. This week has been the following two charts. One indicating my pain level:
Thursday, as I sat in the ER waiting room, praying for mercy for myself, I heard one announcement after another, that reminded me that I am not the only one suffering. During that time, 5 or 6 ambulances incoming, 2 stroke team alerts, and a code blue. God gently reminded me that not one of us expects today to be a day of pain or loss, but for many it will be. So, I began to pray for those other families who were worried and waiting, separated from their loved ones during covid also.
Much to our dismay, the ER did the scan as the doctor wanted, gave me a dose of IV pain meds that brought from a 10 to about a 5, then promptly sent me home all in about 2 hours. They refused to give me a pain medication prescription, due to the "opioid epidemic", and sent me home knowing I had only 3 pills left. I was told to take Tylenol if needed, which is laughable! (this whole opioid topic is a much longer rant, but I will just say as a chronic pain sufferer, millions of patients are being denied drugs that once made their lives livable, because some have abused them. Hopefully they start to come to a more realistic stance and let these pills help those who need them)
He has also dealt graciously with my sin. I am very "self-sufficient" (in my mind anyways), and accepting offers of help doesn't come easy. I don't want to be a burden, or pitied, or an inspiration, and so I tend to just plug along without help, trying to blog my story to remind myself and everyone else that ultimately it is God, and Him alone, who deserve all the praise and glory! He alone is our source of provision and strength. This week He has sustained me with so many words of encouragement (prayers, texts, emails and calls) and many offers of help. (Incredibly thankful for the church Meal Train page they set up, so I don't have to worry about meals for the next couple of weeks) I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of love for Chad and I (and even our adult children Rían and Katherine). Truly, from the bottom of our hearts, Thank you!
From family, our closest friends, all the way to distant acquaintances, you all showed up for us in the midst of a crisis. I hate feeling like a burden on someone else's busy, stressful schedule, many of whom are very likely suffering in their own way. I have NOT been made to feel like a burden, rather the opposite as so many of you wanted so badly to "do something" and this was a way to bless us and serve in a way that we all experience God's goodness.
God has really healed my heart to see how we can set aside our differences, "being there" when needed, and focus back on the truly important things. I have seen that suffering has a way of healing in these ways and more. God has been at work in my heart, and given me a glimpse of that heavenly unity that awaits ALL of those who have placed their faith in Christ. Unity is definitely not a word defining our current cultural climate, but we still have hope that is found in Christ.
