I recently read the book 12 Ways Your Phone is Changing You by Tony Reinke. Tony examines the ways our smart phones are changing how we behave, communicate and participate with those around us. This book is extremely convicting and eye-opening. He does not take the position that our phones are bad, or using them is evil, but in fact quite the opposite is true. He clearly flushes out the usefulness of our pocket computers. These high tech devices help us to spread the Gospel, be more productive, educate, and much more. Unfortunately, our constant connectedness can distract and distance us from those whom we are closest too. Essentially, the more connected we become the lonelier we feel. Where we used to go to the movies with friends, we now stream movies to our living room.
The book's chapters dig deeper into to each of the 12 ways Tony Reinke sees our phones impacting us individually and as a society. The titles of the chapters give a sneak peek as to what you will find inside:
1. We Are Addicted to Distraction
2. We Ignore Our Flesh and Blood
3. We Crave Immediate Approval
4. We Lose Our Literacy
5. We Feed on the Produced
6. We Become Like What We "Like"
7. We Get Lonely
8. We Get Comfortable in Secret Vices
9. We Lose Meaning
10. We Fear Missing Out
11. We Become Harsh to One Another
12. We Lose Our Place in Time
The book is well researched, and well written. It does not condemn technology, or our use of it. It does, however, point out real and present dangers that we should all be aware of. The book points out our Pavlovian dog response to the buzzes and beeps emanating from our devices. Our phones (and as a result we) are "on" 24/7. We are afraid we will miss something. We enjoy getting "likes". This can all be used in a way that can bring glory to God, but frequently it is used to distract us from our boring lives. It might be an escape for us. Our phones and computers provide an atmosphere in which we can portray our lives as something other than what they truly are. We feel jealousy and discontentment as we think we are truly peering into the lives of our neighbors and friends, but in reality seeing only small glimpses into reality.
Technology is a good thing. It is a gift from God, from whom all knowledge originates. Computers and internet have enabled me and others to blog, to share our stories, and the Gospel with people a world away. We have been given an opportunity to use a new, and advanced medium to reach others we would likely never meet face to face, and because of that, it comes with a great responsibility. We will give account for every idle word we have spoken (or written) one day. The distance the internet creates makes us feel safer to be harsher with people. We say things that we would never say if we were standing in front of a group of people. We watch things that we would never consider watching if it weren't from behind the anonymity and privacy of our own screen. This book gives us reason to pause, consider and evaluate our phone usage.
The book is well worth reading, and although it is written by a Christian author, and has a Christian bent, it's research is solid, and the message behind why we respond the way we do is important to reflect upon. You won't be disappointed, and quite possibly you will have your eyes opened wider, like I did.
Wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving!
Until Next Time~
Shari
Thursday, November 15, 2018
Monday, November 12, 2018
ODAAT
I like schedules. Actually, my life is full of lists and schedules. I even make a weekly dinner menu. Order and structure characterize my days, so much so, that some days you will find me doubled over in pain cooking dinner. If the menu says spaghetti on Tuesday, we are eating spaghetti on Tuesday if there is any humanly possible way for me to get it done. Sometimes, Chad comes home from work and just shakes his head in disbelief. "You know that no one else does this, right?" he asks.
Since I like things planned out (no surprises for this girl!) I begin each day looking over the week's activity list. When I was younger and healthier, I always got everything done. Now, I try to save energy for the days that have the most important tasks. The trouble is, ALL the tasks on my list are *important* to me. According to the Meyers-Briggs personality test my kids had me take a few years ago, I am "the duty-fulfiller" type. Basically, this means that I have a list of things that I need to get done each day. I push through to get every last item done, always have, and always......well, actually not anymore. Some days, no matter how hard I push, there are still items left on my to-do list at the end of the day, which tends to leave me feeling like I failed. (Yep, I got issues)
I have always planned my days and weeks far in advance, even down to life's least important tasks. I am a creature of habit. I do laundry on Mondays, clean each level of the house on their specified days, and grocery shop on Thursday mornings. Every chore, and even things like reading or art, are in my calendar in their official time slot. Chad also shakes his head when my phone buzzes every few minutes reminding me to do basically everything. What a glorious time we live in to have smart phones with reminder alarms! I used to write everything on a wall calendar, and use notepads for endless lists.
I have written before about managing expectations. Honestly, I am WAY better at letting others off the hook, giving them grace, and lowering my expectations of them, than I am of myself. I am my own worst enemy. I know that my list doesn't really matter. Although I like structure, I do know that if my laundry doesn't get done until Friday, the world won't fall apart. Honestly, I won't even run out of clean clothes that soon! If my life seems ridiculously organized, all I can say is that I am a LOT more laid back than I was twenty years ago. (Hard to believe, right?) Age, children, marriage, poor health, and most importantly, my faith in Christ have all impacted me in a positive way, and helped me to let go of some things. I have learned to cut myself a little slack. I am still a work in progress.
Lately, each day seems to start differently, unpredictably. I never know how I will feel. New challenges present themselves, and as Chad likes to say, we adapt, improvise, and overcome. I have been made more and more aware of my tendency to want to perfectly perform my (never ending) lists. I am a taskmaster. I place unnecessary burdens upon myself, especially now. There is nothing quite like completing a task, and being able to cross it off my list! I am learning that most of what is on my list is unimportant. I need to prioritize, but I also need to learn to let go. Everything is not of equal importance. It really is okay if the furniture is dusty.
I am trying to take each day as it comes. I can't change how I feel when I wake up every morning, but I can choose how I view each day. I am working to figure out why I am how I am, growth is an important part of life (although I am not a huge fan of change). For now, I am learning to take One Day At A Time (ODAAT). By the grace of God, I am learning to forgive myself, and give myself permission to "fail" at finishing my list. The Lord has been teaching me so much through all these trials, and most recently, He has been gently revealing the heart issues behind my compulsive behavior. My need to do everything on my list is a form of works righteousness. It shows my sinful tendency to want to do something to earn favor, or feel accomplished. It speaks to my trying to control things, which reveals a lack of faith and trust. All my striving to complete a list is simply futility. The good news is that Christ's work was complete. I do not have to contribute anything to my salvation, nor could I add anything to it. Jesus said, "It is finished." I don't need to run myself ragged over a ridiculously long and detailed list of chores. I need only to enter into His rest. I am grateful for God's loving correction, and His grace to live ODAAT.
Until Next Time~
Shari
Since I like things planned out (no surprises for this girl!) I begin each day looking over the week's activity list. When I was younger and healthier, I always got everything done. Now, I try to save energy for the days that have the most important tasks. The trouble is, ALL the tasks on my list are *important* to me. According to the Meyers-Briggs personality test my kids had me take a few years ago, I am "the duty-fulfiller" type. Basically, this means that I have a list of things that I need to get done each day. I push through to get every last item done, always have, and always......well, actually not anymore. Some days, no matter how hard I push, there are still items left on my to-do list at the end of the day, which tends to leave me feeling like I failed. (Yep, I got issues)
I have always planned my days and weeks far in advance, even down to life's least important tasks. I am a creature of habit. I do laundry on Mondays, clean each level of the house on their specified days, and grocery shop on Thursday mornings. Every chore, and even things like reading or art, are in my calendar in their official time slot. Chad also shakes his head when my phone buzzes every few minutes reminding me to do basically everything. What a glorious time we live in to have smart phones with reminder alarms! I used to write everything on a wall calendar, and use notepads for endless lists.
I have written before about managing expectations. Honestly, I am WAY better at letting others off the hook, giving them grace, and lowering my expectations of them, than I am of myself. I am my own worst enemy. I know that my list doesn't really matter. Although I like structure, I do know that if my laundry doesn't get done until Friday, the world won't fall apart. Honestly, I won't even run out of clean clothes that soon! If my life seems ridiculously organized, all I can say is that I am a LOT more laid back than I was twenty years ago. (Hard to believe, right?) Age, children, marriage, poor health, and most importantly, my faith in Christ have all impacted me in a positive way, and helped me to let go of some things. I have learned to cut myself a little slack. I am still a work in progress.
Lately, each day seems to start differently, unpredictably. I never know how I will feel. New challenges present themselves, and as Chad likes to say, we adapt, improvise, and overcome. I have been made more and more aware of my tendency to want to perfectly perform my (never ending) lists. I am a taskmaster. I place unnecessary burdens upon myself, especially now. There is nothing quite like completing a task, and being able to cross it off my list! I am learning that most of what is on my list is unimportant. I need to prioritize, but I also need to learn to let go. Everything is not of equal importance. It really is okay if the furniture is dusty.
I am trying to take each day as it comes. I can't change how I feel when I wake up every morning, but I can choose how I view each day. I am working to figure out why I am how I am, growth is an important part of life (although I am not a huge fan of change). For now, I am learning to take One Day At A Time (ODAAT). By the grace of God, I am learning to forgive myself, and give myself permission to "fail" at finishing my list. The Lord has been teaching me so much through all these trials, and most recently, He has been gently revealing the heart issues behind my compulsive behavior. My need to do everything on my list is a form of works righteousness. It shows my sinful tendency to want to do something to earn favor, or feel accomplished. It speaks to my trying to control things, which reveals a lack of faith and trust. All my striving to complete a list is simply futility. The good news is that Christ's work was complete. I do not have to contribute anything to my salvation, nor could I add anything to it. Jesus said, "It is finished." I don't need to run myself ragged over a ridiculously long and detailed list of chores. I need only to enter into His rest. I am grateful for God's loving correction, and His grace to live ODAAT.
Until Next Time~
Shari
Wednesday, November 7, 2018
Bruised
When people ask how they can pray for me, I frequently tell them to pray that I might suffer well. While I would love for God to heal me, to end my pain and suffering, and to make me well, it is not the thing I ask for most often. No one but God knows how long this season of suffering will last, but I do know that I am called to endure, to continue to praise God, and to bring glory to His name. I want to be a faithful witness. In my weakness and my darkest moments, I cry out to God for strength, grace, and healing, but always end my prayer saying "not my will, but Yours be done."
I was given a book to read recently, "Holding on to Hope: A Pathway through Suffering to the Heart of God" by Nancy Guthrie. If you have gone through a period of suffering, grief, or loss, get this book! She brought up a great point in the book, and it has really stuck with me. She mentioned that we seem to tack on the little phrase "Your will be done" at the end of our prayers, but really should start our prayers in this manner. Imagine if we could really give all our wants and desires over to the Lord and pray "Your will be done", fully trusting He will work all things for our good. Honestly, just go read the book, as I am not doing it any justice here! It is hands-down the best book on suffering I have read, and I have read a LOT of them.
Before I sign off, I figured it is time for some updates. First, I began my weekly IVIg infusions on Friday, October 26th, and will have my 3rd one this Friday. Side effects thus far are fatigue and a mild headache, although last Sunday I had a full blown migraine. Additionally, my veins aren't cooperating, so the doctors are currently deciding if I should have a port put in to enable easy access for the IV. It took 3 attempts last week to get the IV started, and my arms are very bruised, but I know that God does not break a bruised reed.
Hopefully, my body will adjust, and treatment can continue. I am really suffering, and this is the last line of treatment. With my legs, the main symptoms were numbness, weakness, cramping, loss of reflexes and balance issues, but overall not painful. Now that we realize my upper body issues are related to the CIDP also, it has helped me to understand some of my symptoms. While I do have numbness, weakness, and muscle cramping in my arms, I also have constant burning nerve pain in my neck and hands. The most painful aspect has been the random electric shocks that shoot down my arms unexpectedly. I remain cautiously optimistic that this treatment will provide some relief, choosing each day to not linger in the self pity and depression that constantly stalk me. Pray for me to continue to cling to my Savior, and to suffer faithfully. I know He will give me the grace needed to live each day for His glory.
The last thing to tell you about is a letter I recently wrote to the doctor (whom shall be known as "Dr. D") who performed my original surgery. I wrote three pages explaining everything that has transpired since 2009 when he removed the "tumor." I wasn't sure "Dr. D" would even read the letter, remember me, or respond. He was only my doctor for about a year, before we moved on to second and third opinions. Since he is at a teaching hospital, the letter was meant to inform and be used as a learning experience. I was pleasantly surprised to receive a two page hand-written response from "Dr. D" a couple weeks later. His response was sincere and humble. He admitted he should have done better at following up with me. It was a cathartic thing to do, and helps me to close that chapter and move on. And so, I am moving on...
Until Next Time~
Shari
I was given a book to read recently, "Holding on to Hope: A Pathway through Suffering to the Heart of God" by Nancy Guthrie. If you have gone through a period of suffering, grief, or loss, get this book! She brought up a great point in the book, and it has really stuck with me. She mentioned that we seem to tack on the little phrase "Your will be done" at the end of our prayers, but really should start our prayers in this manner. Imagine if we could really give all our wants and desires over to the Lord and pray "Your will be done", fully trusting He will work all things for our good. Honestly, just go read the book, as I am not doing it any justice here! It is hands-down the best book on suffering I have read, and I have read a LOT of them.
Before I sign off, I figured it is time for some updates. First, I began my weekly IVIg infusions on Friday, October 26th, and will have my 3rd one this Friday. Side effects thus far are fatigue and a mild headache, although last Sunday I had a full blown migraine. Additionally, my veins aren't cooperating, so the doctors are currently deciding if I should have a port put in to enable easy access for the IV. It took 3 attempts last week to get the IV started, and my arms are very bruised, but I know that God does not break a bruised reed.
Hopefully, my body will adjust, and treatment can continue. I am really suffering, and this is the last line of treatment. With my legs, the main symptoms were numbness, weakness, cramping, loss of reflexes and balance issues, but overall not painful. Now that we realize my upper body issues are related to the CIDP also, it has helped me to understand some of my symptoms. While I do have numbness, weakness, and muscle cramping in my arms, I also have constant burning nerve pain in my neck and hands. The most painful aspect has been the random electric shocks that shoot down my arms unexpectedly. I remain cautiously optimistic that this treatment will provide some relief, choosing each day to not linger in the self pity and depression that constantly stalk me. Pray for me to continue to cling to my Savior, and to suffer faithfully. I know He will give me the grace needed to live each day for His glory.
The last thing to tell you about is a letter I recently wrote to the doctor (whom shall be known as "Dr. D") who performed my original surgery. I wrote three pages explaining everything that has transpired since 2009 when he removed the "tumor." I wasn't sure "Dr. D" would even read the letter, remember me, or respond. He was only my doctor for about a year, before we moved on to second and third opinions. Since he is at a teaching hospital, the letter was meant to inform and be used as a learning experience. I was pleasantly surprised to receive a two page hand-written response from "Dr. D" a couple weeks later. His response was sincere and humble. He admitted he should have done better at following up with me. It was a cathartic thing to do, and helps me to close that chapter and move on. And so, I am moving on...
Until Next Time~
Shari
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